MAY 11, 2022



“Be faithful to your own wife and give your love to her alone” (Proverbs 5:15 Good News Translation).

One of the leading causes of separation and divorce in marriage is unfaithfulness. When either of the couples becomes unfaithful to his/her marriage vows and engages in sexual immorality, the trust could be eroded and the marriage collapse, especially where either of the couples persists in the sin. Be loyal to your spouse. Don’t deal with her (or him) treacherously (Malachi 2:14-16).

Unfaithfulness in marriage is a sin. “Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s” (1 Corinthians 6:18-20 New King James Version).

The apostle Paul goes further to say, “It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control” (1 Corinthians 7:1-5 New King James Version).

Couples should be faithful to each other, and not give their bodies to someone who is not their spouse. Because of uncontrolled attraction to the opposite sex, unsatisfied sexual need, excessive desire for sex, marital crisis, desire to get even with an unfaithful spouse, or similar unjustifiable reasons, a spouse may be unfaithful, which erodes trust. Hebrews 13:4 says, “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge” (New King James Version).

Except there is genuine repentance on the part of the guilty spouse, and forgiveness from his or her partner, together with proper counseling, extra-marital sex destroys marriage. Every married person should be wary of being caught in a compromising position with the opposite sex, especially one who is a willing accomplice. The devil can set up a man or a woman with the opposite sex who from the outset is lusting after him or her for extramarital sex. To such an agent of the devil, it’s not a big deal; it’s actually what the person wants.

Proverbs 6:25-29 says, “Do not lust after her beauty in your heart, nor let her allure you with her eyelids. For by means of a harlot a man is reduced to a crust of bread; and an adulteress will prey upon his precious life. Can a man take fire to his bosom, and his clothes not be burned? Can one walk on hot coals, and his feet not be seared? So is he who goes in to his neighbor’s wife; whoever touches her shall not be innocent” (New King James Version).

Unfaithfulness has destroyed many marriages, and sometimes the couple couldn’t explain what went wrong. It didn’t happen suddenly. The process started in the past and the guilty spouse was enjoying the pleasures of sin instead of repenting and retracing his or her steps. All the inappropriate sexual touching, sexting or forwarding sexually explicit photos and messages through mobile phones or other devices, pornography, etc. constitute sexual immorality but were hardly seen as such. Those who practised these sexual activities didn’t stop there. They eventually got involved in extra-marital sex.

Be careful. James 1:13-15  says, “Let no one say when he is tempted, ‘I am tempted by God’; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone. But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death” (New King James Version).

The temptation to engage in extra-marital sex may come, but like every other temptation, you should not fall into it. Bind that demon and cast out the sinful thought. Replace the sinful thought with an edifying thought. 1 Peter 5:8-9 says, “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world” (New King James Version). If you think you’re standing strong, be careful so that you don’t fall into the same sin others have fallen into (1 Corinthians 10:12). Abstain from every form of evil (1 Thessalonians 5:22).

Be faithful to your spouse. Don’t violate your marriage vows. “Be faithful to your own wife and give your love to her alone” (Proverbs 5:15 Good News Translation). Verses 18-20 warn, “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth. As a loving deer and a graceful doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times; and always be enraptured with her love. For why should you, my son, be enraptured by an immoral woman, and be embraced in the arms of a seductress?” (New King James Version).

Precautions to take

1. Love the Lord with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind (Matthew 22:37; Mark 12:30). Be faithful or loyal to God.

2. Love your wife, as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself up for it (Ephesians 5:25; Colossians 3:19). Don’t betray your wife.

3. Submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord (Colossians 3:18).

4. Don’t deny each other sexual relations. “The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control” (1 Corinthians 7:4-5 New King James Version).

5. Spend time with your spouse and develop intimacy with each other. Spending too much time away from home provides an opportunity for unfaithfulness or cheating. In Genesis 26:8, Isaac was at home showing endearment to Rebekah, his wife.

6. Communicate your feelings to your spouse rather than bottling up your feelings or discussing intimate things about yourself with someone who is not your wife or husband.

7. Set boundaries for your relationship with the opposite sex; avoid close friendship with a man or woman who is not your spouse. Don’t stay alone with someone who is not your spouse for a prolonged time.

8. Do not keep a relationship with the opposite sex that is not known to your spouse. Also, be sensitive to cut off from any relationship with the opposite sex in the workplace, church, community, etc. that is drawing you into an entanglement that could result in extramarital sex.

Jesus said whoever looked at a woman to lust for her had already committed adultery with her in his heart (Matthew 5:28). If you are feeling sexually attracted to someone who is not your spouse, get out of the relationship. If it is at work, avoid the person or seek a transfer or redeployment if possible.

9. If anyone is making advances toward you, knowing that you’re married, reject it unambiguously. Don’t react in a way that could give him an opportunity that could allow him to approach you again.

10. Pray for your marriage. Pray for yourself and your spouse that the Lord will keep you and protect your marriage from immoral men and women.

Keep your marriage vows. Be faithful to your spouse.


If you are not born again, you need to give your life to Jesus now. I urge you to take the following steps: *Admit that you are a sinner and you cannot save yourself and repent of your sins. *Confess Jesus as your Lord and Saviour. *Renounce your past way of life – your relationship with the devil and his works. *Invite Jesus into your life. *As a mark of seriousness to mature in the faith, start attending a Bible-believing and Bible-teaching church. There they will teach you how to grow in the Kingdom of God.

Kindly say this prayer now: O Lord God, I come unto You today. I know I am a sinner and I cannot save myself. I believe that Jesus is the Son of God who died on the cross to save me and God raised Him on the third day. I repent of my sins and confess Jesus as my Lord and Saviour. I surrender my life to Jesus now and invite Him into my heart. By this prayer, I know I am saved. Thank You, Jesus, for saving me and making me a child of God.

I believe you have said this prayer from your heart. Congratulations! You will need to join a Bible-believing and Bible-teaching church in your area where they will teach you how to live your new life in Christ Jesus. I pray that you flourish like the palm tree and grow like the cedar of Lebanon. May you grow into Christ in all things and become all God wants you to be. I will be glad to hear from you. The Lord be with you.

PRAYER POINTS: In the name of Jesus, I shall keep my marriage vows and be faithful to my spouse. I shall not fall into the temptation of sexual immorality; the snare of seducers will not catch me. Father, let Your peace return to every troubled marriage and let husbands and wives be faithful to each other. Father, I pray for total healing for those who have gone through divorce or separation. Give them peace and joy.

(For over 800 in-depth and powerful messages by T. O. Banso, visit

T. O. Banso is the President, Cedar Ministry International, Abuja, Nigeria.
Phone No: +2348155744752, +2348033113523
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